killer memories. [open]

The day was bright and sunny. The sky was blue and clear. You would think that it would have been warm, but it was still just as cold when rain was in the air. The wind was strong and gusty, blowing the tall moor grass and forcing it to dance. No cloud was in sight anywhere near the sky, and the waves crashing upon the lake shore could be heard from the Windclan camp, if you were listening for them. No creature except the few birds that had stuck around was awake or around, probably because it was too cold to be anything but asleep. Comfortably at least. Perhaps that was why he was out. Because he knew no one else would be. Lurking among the moor grass was an orange tom of average size. His chest and paws were white, but the rest of him was the same ginger color as the grass in leaf-fall.

He walked along the moor, not hunting or looking for anything in particular. Just walking along, wishing she was here to be with him. But she wasn't. She never would be. She was in Starclan, looking over him. At least, he hoped she was looking after him. He would be looking after her if he was the one who had died. He hung his head, jade eyes filled with sadness. He was always somber these days, always melancholy. He used to be the epitome of rebel toms, but now he was just a senior warrior who's heart couldn't take anymore. He looked back up to the land around him, trying to keep his mind focused on the scenery. But that would never happen for long. She always found a way of creeping back into his mind. Oh how he missed her. How he would never forget her. Shadedapple was the one cat who understood him, who shared his pain. And when she died, he lost himself. or at least, a part of himself. A part of himself he would never get back.

He had to stop walking. He plopped down in the middle of the tall grass, disappearing into it's roots. He laid down, head on his paws. He was tired of always having to be sad. He wished with all his heart he could be happy. He did a pretty good job when Galefire, his son, was around, but it disappeared when he was alone. He couldn't figure out where he was supposed to fit into the clan. He wasn't a hunter. He had honed his skills in fighting, but he wasn't the best fighter in the clan. Not by far. He was just occupying space. He went on patrols every once in a while, but mostly he was just there. He closed his eyes. She was always the one who gave him a purpose in life. She was always the one who laid next to him and told him he was a part of the clan, and he always had a place - a home - here. He could hear her voice still, clear as day, as if she were sitting right next to him. But when he opened his eyes he was alone. All alone.

He burst into a sprint, suddenly. His muscles rippled underneath his fur as he ran. He paws hit the ground with soft thuds. He parted the dancing grass, wind trying to blow him away. But he wasn't going anywhere. Oh no. Not anytime soon. The wind rushing into his face, it made him forget about everything. He took a sharp turn, and instead of heading toward the lake, he headed toward Riverclan territory. Not necessarily to go there, but just in that general direction. He was still a long way from there borders. The run was exhilarating. It was the closest he ever came to happiness anymore. With the wind blowing through his thick orange fur, Orangeflash felt the ecstasy pulsing through his veins. It had been such a long time since he had felt wind like this. It was like he could start flying at any moment, flying away into her arms. Oh how sweet that would be.

O R A N G E F L A S H